We all have that one person in our lives—usually a kindly old aunt—whose sole purpose on Earth is to make you indulge. Go hang out at her house. Are you hungry? Here's a WHOLE LASAGNA, just for you. You deserve it, she'll say. You've been working so hard! (You haven't been). Open her cabinets—they are stocked with everything you shouldn't eat—it's like the junk food aisle of your local supermarket.
When you're in her Indulgence Palace, you definitely shouldn't spend your precious free time catching up on work you've been neglecting, you should watch Mrs. Doubtfire and eat several pints of Haagen Daaz. When she asks why you don't visit more often it is literally because your body can't handle it, but don't tell her that.
That's why this Mega Calorific Canister ($110, Jonathan Adler) is the perfect gift for her. It'll house her various high-calorie treats and resonate with her way of life. Live big, get big, who cares? You hungry or what?