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Entries in 12 days of christmas (59)


[12 DAYS OF GIFT GUIDES] Gifts for the Whiskey Enthusiast 

Some people are into wine.  Some people are into beer.  Some people don't drink and are into telling you about it constantly.  And then, some people are into whiskey.  It used to be that only guys like your leathery old uncles were into whiskey.  The type of men that drove trucks, smoked a pack of cigarettes a day, and actually took bars up on their beer and shot special.  They weren't into whiskey like today's guys are.  They didn't care about the oak barrels it was aged in or where it was made.  They cared about whether it was cheap and whether it got the job done ("the job," of course, was to get them shitfaced).

But the new crop of guys who are into whiskey like the good millennials they are.  That means they want to know everything about what they're drinking—where it was made, how much it was aged, and everything in between.  Their minds catalogue all of the different types of whiskey they've tried—what they liked, what they didn't like.  What gave them a killer hangover and what was gentle on them even after drinking a lot of it. What should be taken in shot form and what should be sipped.  

They covet really expensive bottles and only break them out really amazing days and really shitty days.  So this holiday season, while you might not be shelling out $150 for his favorite bottle of whiskey, you can get the whiskey enthusiast something that he's sure to love.  If you're lucky, he might love it enough to break out his favorite bottle and share a glass with you.    

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[12 DAYS OF GIFT GUIDES] Gifts for Everyone on Your Goddamned List

It is BLACK FRIDAY, the absolute worst shopping day of the year, where crazy yokels stand in a line outside of Walmart at 4AM, eagerly awaiting their chance to trample their fellow man to buy a flatscreen TV on severe discount.  Puts you in the holiday spirit, right?  Can you hear the Nat King Cole playing?   

Take my advice and STAY HOME.  There are so many great things you can buy ON THE INTERNET.  I will show them to you.  Yes, I will show them to you in the form of our annual 12 Days of Gift Guides, where I post—you guessed it—12 gift guides chock full of ideas on what to buy your parents, your spouse, your casual work acquaintance, your estranged Aunt Becky, etc.

The gift guides will start Monday, and continue until 12/24.  

But if you cannot WAIT for all of this fantastic shopping inspiration, you can check out the 12 Days of Gift Guides of the past.  You can also follow me on Twitter and Facebook for links to gift guides I'm writing for other sites because I'm a psychotic overachiever.  Still not satisfied?  Subscribe to the e-newsletter in the sidebar, or check out the buttons above it, which allow you to sort by how much you want to spend, or what type of thing you're looking for. 


[12 DAYS OF GIFT GUIDES] So You Waited Until the Last Minute

It's December 24, so there's not much you can do aside from run frantically to the mall and scoop up a bunch of shit that you didn't plan out or even think about.  What a great way to treat your loved ones.  

But if you're looking for inspiration for the type of person you'll be next year (the type of person who consults gift guides and plans things out in advance), or if you're just avoiding spending time with family—read all of our gift guides for this year:














[12 DAYS OF GIFT GUIDES] Gifts for the Crazy Cat Lady 

Dog people will never understand why cat people even exist.  Dogs are friendly and fun.  You can take them to the park and to the beach.  They love road trips.  Cats are aloof and edgy.  To say that they don’t travel well is the understatement of the century.  But why are there legions of people who can’t get enough of their cat?

Well, there’s really no explanation, other than they’re fluffy and cute and maybe cat people like to work for the affection that they get, amiright?  But browse the aisles of any pet store and you’ll see that dogs are completely overrepresented and cats are completely underrepresented.  The only pets that are more underrepresented than cats in the pet store are the exotic birds, and the fact that most of them can speak for themselves kind of cancels that out anyway.  I digress.  The point is: if you’re looking to buy a gift for a crazy cat lady this year, we’ve got you covered.  She can show off any of these items with pride.  They say, “Sure, I am a cat lady, but I will NOT die alone.”  Or, maybe she will.  Who knows what’s gonna happen to anyone in the end, right?  What’s that?  Too dark?  Too dark for Christmas?  Sorry.  

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[12 DAYS OF GIFT GUIDES] Gifts for Your New Stepmother

Your parents got divorced when you were in your early teens, and your dad remained a single man until recently.  Sure, he had weird dates with a parade of strange women wearing funky jewelry and speaking to you in high-pitched, overly friendly tones ("Hi honey! How ARE you? I'm so excited to finally meet you!"), but they never stuck around for long.    

But shit changed a few years ago.  Your dad met a nice, age-appropriate lady with kids of her own.  He finally had someone to have dinner with and go on trips with.  They got married in a modest backyard ceremony. She wore a tasteful cream-colored pantsuit.  And because you're a fully-grown, semi-reasonable adult, you either genuinely like her or you're ambivalent about her.  None of the anger and mutual hostility that your friends had when they got a stepmother at 12 years old exists with the two of you.  If your dad's happy, you're happy. And if someone's around him all the time, you don't have to worry about him so much.    

But all of these warm, fuzzy feelings (or just general apathy) don't mean that you're close.  Step-parents are always hard to shop for, but they're ESPECIALLY hard to shop for if you've just met this person a year or two ago.  You have more interaction with the barista at your local coffee shop than you do with a person that has the word "mother" or "father" in their titles.

You try to pry advice on what to buy out of your father, but as always, he's useless with this kind of stuff.  Just try to find out the basics.  Does she have a dog?  What is her profession?  Does she like wine?  Who doesn't like sweaters, amiright?  Armed with these basics facts about a virtual stranger who you spend a few times a year with, you'll be able to figure something out for her.  Either that, or get her a gift card to the Olive Garden. Stepmoms love the Olive Garden.  Because breadsticks.   

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