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Entries in paper (53)

Thursday
Jan172013

[GIFTED] We Go Together Card

You know that stupid couple that refers to each other as "my other half?" It's so nauseating and terrible.

In a good relationship, you're not a half to one whole, but a complementary set. You go together like peanut butter and jelly. Beer and cigarettes. Heroin and tear-filled interventions. Or, salt and pepper, as evidenced by this We Go Together Card ($6, BHLDN).

Tuesday
Nov202012

[GIFTED] I Fall For You Card

Not only is it already Fall, Fall is already almost OVER.  Chew on that for awhile.  Thanksgiving is THIS WEEK.  Have you developed a stress rash yet?  Stop hyperventilating, calm down for a second, and realize how cute this I Fall For You Card ($5, Ink Meets Paper) is.  Hurry up and send it to someone you love.  Or someone you're stalking.  Same thing, really.

Wednesday
Nov142012

[GIFTED] Well Done [Steak] Card

If you're a self-righteous foodie like me, this Well Done [Steak] Card ($4, Colette Paperie) depicts exactly what it's like to dine out with jerks like us.  We take someone ordering a steak well done as a personal insult, and that is way more important than giving someone kudos for accomplishing something significant. 

This would be a great card to give someone who just graduated from culinary school, or your mom, who eats steak well done with French dressing to dip it in. 

Tuesday
Oct022012

[GIFTED] Same Fish, Different Bowl Card

Your longtime friend just had a major life change.  She got promoted at work and got a raise.  Or, her great Aunt Janice died and she got a ridiculously large inheritance.  Whatever the reason, she's now able to move on up to a bigger, better apartment.

When you head to her nicer new apartment, stamp out your jealousy and hand over this Same Fish, Different Bowl Card ($4, Colette Paperie).  It'll let her know that even though she now lives in a nice place with nice furniture doesn't mean you're not going to barge in with an 18 pack of Bud Light for a Power Hour. 

Wednesday
Sep262012

[GIFTED] Give Up and Drink Card

FUN FACT: statistically, the most suicides happen on a Wednesday.  Not-so-happy Hump Day, huh?  The thinking behind it is that in the middle of the week, your troubles seem insurmountable and the weekend still seems so far away. 

Instead of jumping off a bridge, how about you do what most people do when they're stressed and angry and despondent?  DRINK. 

Find someone who is equally unhappy with life as you are in this moment, send them this Give Up and Drink Card ($4, Colette Paperie), and take a bottle of wine to the face together.  Misery loves company, right Kathy Bates?